Off my chest...

It's so hard to try to start over when you have so much baggage holding you down....I have recently started a new journey to happiness for the rest of my life. I have narrowed down, and identified many of the things that were making me unhappy, and I am currently taking the steps I need to correct them, for the betterment of myself.
Keeping it real: People say they want you to keep it real, but what exactly is keeping it real? I have noticed that in my past I have presented myself in falsehoods to make myself seem more than I really was. What I have come to learn is that people are going to be with you for you, and if they just want to be there for all the positive shit and none of the bad then they don't need to be in your life. For example you can feel like you know someone, tell them all kinds of shit, and the first chance they get they stab you in the back or jump teams. This has happened to me more than once. Instead of people taking the time to see you have a problem, and try to do an intervention, or seek help for your problem, the talk about you to no end when they are not much better than you in actuallity.
Knowing who is there for the long run and who is there on vacation: Well sadly most of the people I have had in my life over the past five years, were just with me on vacation, and one of the hardest things is to let people go from your life, who you thought you were going to have a life long friendship and or relationship with.
You see like I said above, I am on a journey to true happiness. I am in a new relationship which god has blessed me with, this is why. When I first met this person (Trey) my mind was still in early development phases. I was fresh out of a realtionship that was so emotionally trying on me that I was not feeling anything serious at the moment. I didn't return calls, never went to visit, and didn't care basically, I was young and immature, and he was older established, and mature. We kept in touch, and I could tell he seemed to be happy. I knew that I wanted to move to NYC sometime in the future, but after conversations with some of my mentors, and bestfriends I decided that if I wanted to make a move there would be no better time than the present. We found each other online. I created a a4a account in NYC to meet friends in NYC to get a feel for the city, and the first e-mail I got said "If you really moving to NYC I better be your boyfriend", even then I was like "Okay", it was not until I heard his sexy yet cute voice, and looked at the picture again to remind myself that NO ONE has ever made me feel the way he has. I don't have people to call me and just say they were thinking about me. It was a no brainer, I am more mature, know what type of hard work it takes to be a serious realtionship. My next major question was am I ready for that expecially after just getting out of a realtionship weeks ago, and I anwsered it "YES". You see everything I do, I walk out on faith, and I think that it is Destined for us to be together. I am not perfect, and he understands that, but the most important thing is he sees changes in me no one else sees...I am moving thousands of miles away from home. I am going to school, interning, and going to build relationships hopefully like long ones, but most importantly I will have someone to grow old with, someone I can be honest with, and someone that will value what we have.....It feels good to get shit off me chest....