this past weekend i celebrated gay pride along with thousands of other men, women, women-men, men-women, and children across the country, as we mark the annual anniversary of the stonewall riots in new york city. last year was my first year every attending what people in the life commonly refer to as the "white pride". this year was so different, for many reasons. anyone that is familiar with me know that my sexuality does not define me, it plays a huge role in my daily life, but it is not my sole purpose for life, and i don't eat, sleep and shit the rainbow. however their are a few things i wanted to breakdown for my readers so let me vent...
i knew i was gay at a young age, and i felt it was not right. when you are a young black boy growing up their are certain things you are not supposed to say and do. i remember as a young boy i hated outdoors, i loved dolls, and bright colors, however i knew that it would not be accepted at all. when i came out to my mother at 16 she told me she had known and was just waiting on me to tell her, and that she was going to love me no matter what. at 16 i dove head first into the scene, clubbing 5 nights a week, the boyfriends, all that, then focus changed slowly but surely... a year ago i went though so much as i was going though one of the most difficult periods in my life with a breakup, and just issues that many young adults face.
over the past year i have changed sooo much as a person. you see i have never been ashamed of being gay, however i never celebrated with pride like i did this past weekend. i met sooo many people from an adopted 13 year old with two fathers, to a lady in her early 30's with a 11 year old son that she knows is already gay, and is encouraging him to be himself, she said to me " honey my 11 year old bedazzled and rhimestoned my skirt, and i know already, he is going to be just like my brother, and life with our loved ones is too short for us to dwell on something like homosexuality, we should love each other for who the are not who they are attracted to." i saw so many couple and families all weekend and it reinforced what i want in life right now...
i want the all american life. i want the house or trendy condo with my children. i want the suv to take our children where they need to go, and be able to give children the life i might not have had. i want to shop for toys at christmas time, disney world in the summer, and school plays. i want to cook, "not big on cleaning so hire a great maid or nanny", i want to know true love, and to show the world that we are all God's children and all these society barriers need to be broken down for good. i want to show the world that all gay men are not materialistic label whores that club and fuck all the time, instead most of us want normal lives, we want true love, and happy homes....
this past weekend i met so many people that have made a lasting impact on my life, and reinforced the pride in my heart for who i am in my heart, body and soul, and who I have been for almost 22 years now. i walked in the parade with the human rights campaign, and to walk that stretch of westhimer rd. and see ll those people and have complete strangers feel what i feel, feel the discrimination, hate, but yet so much love was a feeling i could never possibly put into words.....
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