Six Months Later......

So about seven months ago I received a message that would change my life in so many ways. 2010 was a year what many would say was hellish for various reasons. I lost the love of my life, then found out someone else I really cared for didn't give me same love, respect or consideration I had given him. I prayed for change in my life, and more importantly understanding in all aspects of my life. In late September two associates coached me through the process of applying for a new job in a new city, and helped lay the foundation for a new life. It was exactly ten years ago I started to claim my own truth, back in the Spring of 2001 I was dealing with coming out of the closet into a society where the thought of two men together was not in any way acceptable. Unlike many black same gender loving men I was able to discuss my feelings, experiences and even fears with my family. Not having that hurdle would impact my life in so many more ways. In early October I was offered a job with the University of California San Francisco Center for AIDS Prevention Studies on a research project in Dallas, TX. On the cool autumn morning I arrived in Dallas, TX I didn't know what to expect. I was not fully clear of what it meant to work in a community in which I cared about, but in so many ways felt like I had no say so. I jumped in head first speaking from experiences of being a same gender loving Black man living in the South. I told my stories of survival, the stories of being hurt time and time again, the stories about how I felt alone, and often blocked other even those closest to me out! Six months later I find myself being a mentor, friend, and person people come to with their fears, worries, and experiences. I find myself getting calls from mothers with gay sons and daughters about how to be a supportive parent, and ways to encourage conversations with their children. I've become an advocate for many young brothers both scared of and living with HIV, as I go to the doctor with young men, I find myself familiar with the top doctors, nurses, and social service providers in Dallas, and across the country. Weather it's taking a brother in the hospital with complications from HIV Williams Chicken at Parkland, or having lunch with a mother to give her condoms for her teenage son, I took this bull by the horn. I arrived scared of this city, but I find myself loving it more and more each day as I explore different parts each week. I realized the love you have for yourself can be shown in many ways. I let mine show through my work, and expressing how tremendously blessed I am.