Well I have been here in my hometown for a week almost, and I must say it is wearing my nurves thin... I am from Bryan, TX a community of about 70,000 about 100 Northwest of Houston, TX. I arrived last week to start storing, and get rid of some of my many posecessions that will not be making the move to NYC with me. I am here now at my mom's house, I will say I never understood how much I valued having my own apartment, and freedom. Even though I am leaving to return to Houston this week, this visit has been a great reminder of why I left here in the first place. I have been "out" to my family since I was 16, and for the most part they have accepted everything. I often tell people that I was harder on myself than they were on me. With being here the fact that my grandmother called my cousin a cissy today really tripped me out. When I look at my family member here I see the difference in them and I is, they are completely content with living the rest of their lives here. My mother has been here pretty much all of her life, and we have arguements all the time about me and the life I choose to live, not in relation to my sexual orentation, but more of my style, and what I like to spend money on. When I left my hometown I changed sooo much, I moved to the city, I got cultured, and became a custom to certian things. I have sense of style, and culture. I love dining out at fine resturants, wearing nice clothes, and enjoying the city life. I was reading a article about a lady that worked in the DA's office here for like 20+ years, and I was surprised that she was only making 36,000 a year, and when I said that was a shame my mother took offense, and was like "Well this is Bryan ,TX, and that is pretty good for here" I said OMG I HAVE TO GET THE FUCK BACK TO CIVILIZATION ASAP. It is not that the people here are less advanced or anything, they are just content with living comfortable lives in a place that is not productive for a 21 year ols gay man of color with 2 bachelor degrees. I often wonder am I ashamed of where I have come from??
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